Last Saturday we lost my Uncle Eddie to cancer. He had a wonderful life and was surrounded by his family when he died. I'm not a religious person, I don't believe in a lot of traditional views (heaven being one of them). I do, however, believe that when your time comes your energy, your soul, your life force, whatever you want to call it, doesn't just leave forever. I believe that we are constantly being reinvented, reborn. I believe that family units stay together, we become our ancestors. I have no proof of this, of course, it's just what I believe. I don't ask others to believe it or even understand it. When my daughter (who was named after my Grandmother) was born it was like having a little piece of her back. She acts just like a Great-Grandmother she never knew! Maybe it's my way of holding on to a loved one.
Wayne and Eddie Bowen circa 1951This Saturday my little girl turned 5. I was grouchy for an entire week and yesterday I realized it was because she is growing up. I love her being 5, she's funny and makes me laugh all the time. But I miss having a baby around the house (not the diaper part!).
She's a big girl now!
A birthday party at the YMCA 
Cake, need I say more? 
Two kids being goofy
A self portraitWe can't stop the passage of time on our family anymore than we can stop it on ourselves. You take it one day at a time and hope that when your end comes, you too are surrounded by the people in your life that matter. And then you go out into the universe and become new again.
I hope your week is peaceful.
I am so sorry to hear about your loss, but you have such a wonderful way of looking at things.
ReplyDeleteI too come from a entirely different view of religion. My parents always taught us that it was a deeply personal thing that each person was to decide on their own and they were entirely against organized religion. As a kid the entire concept was confusing, but now that I'm a little older I have a lot more respect for what my parents did for us. I think what your doing for your children is wonderful. :)
Kathy,
ReplyDeleteMy sincere condolences to you and your family. Cancer is a horrible disease. I have lost too many I've known to it.
Happy birthday to your 5 year old! No matter how old she is, she will always remain your baby. Although you want to freeze time, remember with each thing that is lost, something is gained. A baby can't go shopping with Mommy and tell you how much she NEEDS another pair of sneakers that sparkle!
Thank you for linking in to the postcard exchange! Please email me (I can't locate your email address) so I may contact you about the specifics.
Deborah
My email address is Deborah@FairfieldHouseNJ.com
ReplyDeleteSorry for your loss. Your little one's pictures are precious.
ReplyDeleteI see you are signed up for the postcard exchange and I'd enjoy exchanging postcards with you. Please email me ruparanoid2 at yahoo dot com