Sunday, February 20, 2011

Don't blog while mad...

It's probably not the wisest of ideas, in fact I'm sure it's breaking some "Internet" rule (anyone seen The Social Network?). Sometimes when your mad at your spouse they tell you they're sorry and then what? The anger just doesn't go away. So what to do with it? Saying your sorry is a good thing and something I have asked my husband on more than one occasion to do; "Just say you screwed up and you're sorry!". Okay, well he's done that but how do I move onto the next phase? How do you move from a screwed up face and a tight neck to "is dinner ready?". I guess it's like anything... time. Just give it time and it's like it never happened.

One of the biggest things I have had to learn in my marriage is how to properly fight. It's probably something we all need to learn - don't hit below the belt, we want a clean fight. But I probably struggle with it more than some. My parents never fought; never even argued and if there was a disagreement it was done in private after we went to bed. The reason for this is not that my parents were always on the same page but that my parents were born in the 30s. My Mother always agreed with my Father and when she didn't he knew it was important enough to back down and let her have her way. She is a saint. I am NOTHING like her, in fact I'm a lot like my Father. It took me a long time to realize that my way was not the only way. Matt and I grew up in two very different households and we have different life experiences so why would we think alike? We fundamentally share the same beliefs. I let him run the business and he lets me run the kids; but we both have input. I have no point of reference on how to fight "clean" so now what?

Taking 10 minutes to myself to type a small blog post and thinking about what I do next is a good start. I feel better now; no screwed up face, no tight neck.

I'll leave you with this poem, I chose it to be read at our wedding. It was written 125 years ago but still rings true today. I guess some things never change, which is probably what the last line eludes to.

Marriage Advice From 1886", by Jane Wells

"Never go to bed angry.
Let your love be stronger than your hate or anger.
Learn the wisdom of compromise, for it is easier to bend a little than to break.
Believe the best rather than the worst.
People have a way of living up or down to your opinion of them.
Remember that true friendship is the basis for any lasting relationship.
The person you choose to marry is deserving of the courtesies and kindness you bestow on your friends.
Please pass this on to your children and their children's children.
The more things change the more they are the same."

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

My son... the scientist

I try not to brag about my kids too much but anyone who know us knows that my 9 year old, Marty, is well let's just say "special".

When Marty was little he could memorize entire books, he started reading in preschool and when we had him tested in Kindergarten he was reading at a 6th grade level. For as long as I can remember when you asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up he would tell you "A Scientist". No cowboy or football player from my boy, nope he wants to be a scientist.

Saturday he decided he wanted to make a solar powered charger for his iPod. Okay. He told us we could get one at Radio Shack (yep, he had already checked it out for us... he's not only informative; he's considerate!). So $15 later, a few failed mis-steps and VoilĂ ! We have a "green" charger. I'm not sure how many sunny days it will take to repay my $15 but hey, it's not about that now is it?

He was so proud of that thing, unfortunately when he finished it was dark so we had to have 3 huge flashlights to test it (kinda defeats the purpose) but it worked. Monday came and it was cloudy so again he couldn't properly test it but today the sun shone bright and my little boy was ecstatic to find out that yes it will charge his iPod.

Sometimes it's hard for us to remember he's only a little boy. He doesn't talk like it; doesn't think like it. So when he acts like it, it's a little bit of a surprise. Tonight after my kids went to bed I came downstairs to find this... today's big experiment.

Super bouncy shoes.

I guess he is 9 after all...

Have a great week!


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